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Showing posts from March, 2017

It Could Be You ~ What Domestic Violence Actually Looks Like

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It has been some time since I posted here. I only post when I feel I need or want to. The subject must be important to me in order to want to share my thoughts with the few of you who may read this.   I am pretty sure that none of you know what exactly I do for work. Well, one small part of my job is redacting audio and video for the Police Department. Now that we have body cameras and a new recording system that small part of my job has increased. With that I now see and hear more than I ever did before. This week as I was redacting a case my gut hurt and I felt sick. I was listening to a woman tell officers all the reasons why her former partner would never follow through on threats to her life. All I could think about was Mary. All I could think about was all these excuses mean nothing when one event can end your life. One event that will forever change your friends and family’s life. One event that you never thought would really happen will destroy you and your loved one’s fore
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Lake Havasu Half- The 1st Day Of The Rest Of My Life

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The day I thought may never come again finally came and it was AMAZING!!!!! Toughman Lake Havasu was about so much more than my final finish time. It was about beating demons. It was about proving to my body that it CAN do what the mind tells it. It was about taking the first step into my “new” training/racing life. The old me is gone. Her  body and snarky sense of humor are still here but the engine has been rebuilt. I needed this race to prove to myself that I was going to be ok. Right up until the morning of I still had this tiny voice in my head that said  “What if you fall asleep on the bike? What if you can’t get out of bed for 4 days afterwards? What if you blackout? What if the old me is still in here and just needs this door to open to come back to life?” Well, the old me didn’t come out to play and I feel positive that she has gone away forever. I have worked so hard to make sure that I don’t even look at food that isn’t ok for me to eat, take all the right combo of
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Relentless Forward Progress

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I promised myself a year ago that if I ever felt well enough again to race and train I would never squander an opportunity to do so.  Fast forward 1 year and 1 amazing opportunity later and here I am. I am finally about to race again. And like I promised myself… I am taking full advantage of all that I have been given. The last year has given me my health back, a new and HUGE chance to be coached by someone who gets me and a new bike of my dreams. I cannot waste this time. 3 years have already been lost so to speak. I used to get asked a lot what makes me want to push through and Ironman or big training days.  It started as an escape. A way to do what my mother always said I could never do. Be someone. Do something amazing. Succeed. To grow up the way I did makes it easy to push through pain and see things to the end. I can’t give up because I had to fight the 1 st 17 years of my life or I would not have survived. Everyday was a day closer to leaving. In racing every stroke
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