It Could Be You ~ What Domestic Violence Actually Looks Like

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It has been some time since I posted here. I only post when I feel I need or want to. The subject must be important to me in order to want to share my thoughts with the few of you who may read this.   I am pretty sure that none of you know what exactly I do for work. Well, one small part of my job is redacting audio and video for the Police Department. Now that we have body cameras and a new recording system that small part of my job has increased. With that I now see and hear more than I ever did before. This week as I was redacting a case my gut hurt and I felt sick. I was listening to a woman tell officers all the reasons why her former partner would never follow through on threats to her life. All I could think about was Mary. All I could think about was all these excuses mean nothing when one event can end your life. One event that will forever change your friends and family’s life. One event that you never thought would really happen will destroy you and your loved one’s fore
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Strength in Pain

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It has been four weeks since IMTX. Plenty of time to recover, right? YES!!! I did my first run two weeks ago and loved it! I didn't feel like a 41 year old that just raced for 14.5 hours a few weeks earlier. I was excited. I thought " HELL YES! I AM BACK!". Then.....crickets..... I have done some rides and some runs but my heart isn't in it. Here it is... all my tri brothers and sisters know what I am going to say... Post Ironman Blues.

I thought that by signing up for two IM's this year I would kick that dreaded  post IM bullshit square in the teeth with my steel toed boots. Man was I wrong. So.... on my run Weds after work I decided to do a variation on my coaches workout. Fartleks. Instead of rollers I would run as hard as I could up to Lowell Observatory from Upper Lake Mary parking lot and I would take  it easy on the way back.

This gave me time to think. As I was huffing and puffing my way up my mind started to drift (shocker I know...oh..SHINY THINGS!). But I was trying to figure out why I was in such a slump. I had a kick ass 10 days off for Texas, had a crazy two weeks with bachelor/ bachelorette party and an amazing friends wedding. Then it hit me.I would have to somewhat give up all that fun in order to train the way I need to to PR at IMAZ. Maybe I am scared. Maybe I am not ready to stop having as much fun (outside of training).

This isn't like any other race training. It is time consuming. Add that to a full time job and a commute and it doesn't leave much time for anything else. Getting up at 0300-0400 and going to bed before the sun sets can really cramp ones social life. So why do I do it? Then I hit the top of the hill 28 minutes later. Lungs burning, lips dry, legs cramping, HR in Z5 and a stitch in my side. That is why! PAIN!! I love the feeling of pain. Not a broken leg kind of pain but the pain that says "F**K YA! I DID THAT".

So here I am, the night before a weekend of chasing other peoples asses. Michael will kill me tomorrow and Mary and Dan will finish me off on Sunday. I want this. I NEED this. I am so lucky to have such great friends here in AZ. They get it. I can still have fun just not rock star fun until the day after IMAZ.... When, once again, post Ironman blues will set in and I will I have to remind myself....... There is strength in pain. Go get it AGAIN!

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It Could Be You ~ What Domestic Violence Actually Looks Like

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Image
It has been some time since I posted here. I only post when I feel I need or want to. The subject must be important to me in order to want to share my thoughts with the few of you who may read this.   I am pretty sure that none of you know what exactly I do for work. Well, one small part of my job is redacting audio and video for the Police Department. Now that we have body cameras and a new recording system that small part of my job has increased. With that I now see and hear more than I ever did before. This week as I was redacting a case my gut hurt and I felt sick. I was listening to a woman tell officers all the reasons why her former partner would never follow through on threats to her life. All I could think about was Mary. All I could think about was all these excuses mean nothing when one event can end your life. One event that will forever change your friends and family’s life. One event that you never thought would really happen will destroy you and your loved one’s fore
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